“Here I sit alone, at first, afraid. Scared. Uncertain.
Realizing that there is no one. There, lay the memories.
A forgotten time beyond oneself. You think you can beat me?
I think you’ve already won.
I see who you are loneliness, you’re a creator.
You show me where to be and where to go. Without you I’d be nothing.
I yell and yell, I cry. With no one to hear me.
Except for one. That is me.
I’ve grown to understand that being alone is healthy. Western culture seems to create this idea that loneliness is a horrible thing. There is a negative connotation to everything that has to being with alone.
“You’ll end up ALONE” “Forever alone” “I need to be with a friend because I’m lonely”
For me, loneliness is beautiful. It is a time of peace, understanding, and growth. Even if you hate the moment that you’re alone, you’re still capable of learning from it. I started experimenting with the idea of embracing loneliness, instead of trying to rid it from my life. Making conscious efforts to be alone with productivity. Loneliness seen as a concept can help utilize it, just like everything in life has its purpose and usefulness to develop yourself. Here are some things that I’ve developed through embracing that loneliness, and being alone.
I’ve learned how to cope better
Ever feel that,”I just need a minute to breathe.” moment? That’s probably a good sign that you need some peace and time to reflect. When you have more of those moments that you create for yourself, it’s easier to be clear headed and prepared in the face of adversity. I don’t rely on another person to help me be at peace with a situation.
I’ve realized the type of person I want to be
While alone, I spend a lot of time reflecting on life. Am I the person I want to be? Am I the person I looked up to as a kid? Will I be the person my kids look up to? The excitement of who I could be for myself and others shot up a lot when I started utilizing my loneliness, because I realized who it is that I wanted to be.
I learned what I liked
When I don’t have people to tag along with to do things, I tend to not take “boredom” as an option. I’d much rather get creative. I tend to go on my own little adventures. Over the summer, I did a lot of hammocking in random places, sleeping on rooftops, and really trying to understand photography. These only scratch the surface. Not only that, but when I train Parkour alone, I love it that much more, because it’s pure and influenced by my own thoughts.
I appreciate so much more
It’s kind of a “stop and smell the roses” thought process. When I’m alone, I have time to see things that I don’t see when you’re busy being occupied by others. This gives me a chance to step back and realize some things. We are all living, we are all going through things, we all see things completely different. Regardless of my current situation, there can be someone out there having a worse time than me, or even a better time than me. How do I choose to go about it?
I continually learn more about my spirituality
When I’m alone, I take time to meditate and pray. This helps me realize a big picture about life. What is this body that I have? What should I do with it? What CAN I do with it? Through meditation I get the chance to have a conversation with myself, and my spiritual self. To realize that the love that we can share and experience is quite a beautiful opportunity.
All considered, this begs the question, are we ever really alone? To me spending time alone and reflecting has helped me grow closer to God, to my family, my friends, and to strangers. It’s helped me understand and appreciate what I have when I have it, and realize how good it is to balance alone time, and spending time with others. Take time to breathe, stop and smell the roses, and cherish.